Once inside we were not in a classroom but in a huge auditorium filled with tables with low-lit lamps on top on them like in a supper club. We were there to see a magic show. The show was loud and funny and I got drunk as I watched it. The girl sitting at our table and I were chosen as volunteers in the magic show. We went up in front and had to sit back to back in a large basket. The basket began to spin around very fast, like a carnival ride. It was flying through the air and going upside down. In the background behind us was a huge screen on which they were playing a video of arguments between Joe Biden and John McCain. It was a contest to see whose story was sadder--Biden lost his family in a car accident, McCain was a prisoner of war. At the end of the video the magician yelled out, "Hard times, everything's okay, or nothing?" We had to supply the right answer. I was very dizzy from being inside the upside down spinning basket. The other girl mumbled something that the audience couldn't hear. I yelled out, "HARD TIMES!" I won. The basket stopped. I clambered out and fell over on the ground. All around me I could hear applause and the announcer saying that my prize was...I couldn't quite make it out. I think I fainted.
Then I was back at "home." I lived with my older husband (who I think was played by Paul Giamatti) in a slightly-rundown, very gothic old Victorian mansion. The grounds were untended and overgrown, and I loved the creepy garden. Our neighbor was with us in the garden, and the three of us were talking about what I had won in the magic show. Evidently my prize was that I could go to any baseball game in America and automatically go to first base. I said, "So if I go to a Yankees game and somebody hits a triple, I'll score a run!" My husband went inside and the neighbor grabbed my arm. He pointed to his house. "Do you see that gate between my garden and yours?" he asked. "I had that built for you. I love you. Let's get rid of your husband."
So we locked my husband in the house and I went to live with the neighbor and his wife. Apparently she had no problem with me living there as her husband's mistress. But after a while we tired of him. So we got rid of him. And then she and I lived together happily ever after.
1 comment:
hi talyor! i pick my nose as well. i like the words you write.
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